This line keeps coming up in my life "I have to go find myself-" but I've always felt this to be a cop-out of not actually doing the work to discover who one really is. This song is grappling with the idea behind that line, but also the concept behind it in conjunction with our deeper meanings.
This song's melody and original chorus line: "I'm trying hard not to believe that it's in control, of everything" came to me in a dream. I've always romanticized the idea of a higher power as something outside of human conception and even beyond the worship we bestow upon it but my own skepticism, I've found, gets in the way of allowing it into my life despite believing a presence.
How can we have faith if we don't allow faith in our lives? I don't have the answers but I definitely have the struggle within me.
lyrics
It flips a death card, but I'm always changing from a skeptic to a cynic. Wings of butterflies cause sea-level rise around the world.
Who are you by yourself? Don't you get to decide? You're going to find out, out there- somehow what's in here?
So who are you by yourself? Don't you get to decide- that's a sadness. My vibe- it is off again. That's a sadness co-ink-i-dink or head case- whatever feels better.
And I've never seen a black hole, but I feel it deep in my bones that the thing pulling at my arm is as real as ever. I can not relate.
If crying's supposed to help, then maybe I've never been better- or- maybe I've never been worse? Maybe life doesn't follow by the letter.
So who are you by yourself? Who are you by yourself? Who are you by yourself- when you are all alone? Who are you by yourself? Who are you by yourself? Who are you by yourself- that's a sadness!
credits
released April 22, 2024
Written and composed by Matt "MW" Walker
Vocals and Instrumentation: Matt "MW" Walker
Violin: Nick Ewing
Mixed by Matt "MW" Walker
Mastered by Dane Giordano at Young Avenue Sound
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